The Crushing Self-Talk
It is one of those days, I’m laying in my warm bed, covers up to the chin. I hear rumbling going on downstairs in the kitchen. Please let that be coffee being made, I think to myself. Get up? No, it’s too much, I just…I…cannot…do…it…. The alarm has not gone off yet, that means I have some time left. Check the clock–yes fifteen minutes. Everything is cold, I’m complaining to myself now about the Midwestern weather. It was 95 degrees last week I swear! I’m cold I don’t want to move, the countdown continues–seven minutes until alarm goes off. Dang you’re Miss lazy pants, get up! I fall back to sleep, and that sound, buzz buzz. I hate that sound. It is cold and I’m lazy and uncomfortable, this is going to hurt–I know it’s going to hurt. I convince myself there is hot coffee awaiting, so I take that first Godforsaken step. Then I hear my Husband-dude yell from downstairs, “Coffee maker is broken!” Oh Lord help me. It’s a dark gloomy morning and no coffee.
I’m a wimp, I’m lazy, I’m a good for nuthin’ piece of #$#!#@!!! Yeah, all that, how did the same creator that made the likes of Mother Theresa, Cher & Oprah put this mess together to create me? Lord, they don’t even need two names. I bet those ladies never had a panic attack because the coffee maker broke. I bet they never… oh blah blah, they had hard times too, and probably never once whined about it. Dang giant baby. Geez, you’re how old? Give up already, you’ll never do anything, you’re too old, too ugly, to stupid, too whatever.
Created by Divine Wisdom and Purpose
That’s horrible, but we all do it. Maybe because we are not feeling well, get frustrated or things are just not going as we planned. Whatever the reason, that old saying of being our own worst critic tends to be an old saying for a reason. All humans are worthwhile, all were created with a purpose. Even for people not believing in creation it still serves us all to know that nobody is just a clump of cells with no purpose. I like to imagine a place of creation, of angels and the Divine celebrating every single soul, every hair on our head and every cell of our physical beings. The guardian angel says,
“This soul is going to affect the entire world, help humanity in its evolution, and may never even know exactly how much they are needed or why, but what fun it will be to watch.” And then the infinite wisdom of the Divine breathes life into the soul. Of course this place of creation is all shiny white and perfect in my inner vision, and maybe we get a glimpse and then forget all about it. Then to earth, we go. Earth, the place of mud, mosquitoes, annoying coffee makers that break; all kinds of ever ending dilemmas that beat us up, teach us, and make us learn how to be negative. It seems so much easier to stay where it is shiny white and perfect. And so, our minds once they start in childhood, never seem to stop until we find sleep. I guess that’s why nobody loves the sound of an alarm clock?
Kicking the Crushers to the Curb
I decided that being logical when frustrated is difficult, and that’s why I devoted time to naming each of my “crushers”. The thoughts that push away the logical, and bring my mojo down to the lowest lows. My naming and claiming these crushers, has made it a lot easier to make fun of them when they come up, and put them aside and get myself to think more logically, move forward and be much more gentle in my self talk. For each of my illogical ways of thinking, I came up with an inner vision to alert myself of the faulty illogical thinking. You’ll be surprised that after consciously working with each of these, eventually your subconscious will work with you and send you an inner vision to alert you of the self-crushing thought you are having. Think about it, the world can be a mean place full of bullies, psychic vampires, and challenges. Be kind to you, and I hope these will help!
Inner Visions to Assist
Speculative 
These are ideas that have zero proof to back them. “This is going to hurt” before trying something like getting out of bed. Maybe one day it hurt, but there is no proof that today isn’t going to be different. So, that thought did nothing to help the situation, and with zero proof to show that there was any truth in it.
My inner vision: 1970’s Elton John glasses (spectacles)
I’m a Unicorn
These are the ideas that are pure fantasy. I’m so special that things should be different than they are. Ideas like it isn’t fair that I have this illness, this car problem or whatever. Basically fighting with what is and saying that it has been all done wrong. Pretty sure I don’t know better than what is in reality~darn!
My inner vision: unicorn horn.
I’m a Dunce
Yup, name calling. Anytime I think I need a new name other than the one I have, I get the dunce cap. I’m stupid, lazy, crazy, ugly. The truth is nobody is always stupid, lazy, crazy or ugly. Those are all silly labels we can wear at times, but not all the time.
Inner vision: Dunce Cap
I’m not a Rock Star- Dammit!
These are the comparison thoughts. Like Oprah and Cher get to live with just one name? That lady has the nicest cleanest house, great kids, a perfect smile etc. and I don’t. What is wrong with me that I don’t have all that?! The truth is we all have unique things about us that are all ours.
Inner vision: a giant hot pink microphone.
Chicken Little
I can’t do this, this is awful, this is the worst thing in the world, nothing will ever work in my life ever again! OMG!!!! Yeah right… The sky is falling on top of your world. Yes, horrid things happen, but the truth is you are resilient, you darling have gotten through some awful things in life and you will get through this too! That’s truth!
Inner vision: A little yellow chicken on my shoulder.
The yeah butt
You know when things are down and someone tries to help you get over it with ideas and all you have to say to them for their creativeness is “yeah but”? Example:
You: So, my car isn’t running how will I get to work?
Friend: Call me and I’ll drive you.
You: Yeah, but I go to work at 2 a.m. I wouldn’t want to wake you!
Friend: Call an Uber?
You: Yeah, but, have you read how many people have been robbed or worse?
So, obviously any solution that is given to you is not going to work! What comes after a butt? Well in this case…. inner vision: Toilet paper hanging off my shoe.
So on a bad day, I have a huge Elton John glasses, a horn a dunce cap, a giant pink microphone, a chicken on my shoulder, TP trailing off my shoe; And I am 100% me & I get a mic drop baby. Looks ridiculous, but hopefully it’ll raise up your vibe and bring you a smile!
All these thoughts, and life is short. It won’t ever stop but hopefully next time it starts you’ll have an action plan. You’ll find that as easily as they start they can stop, and even with a grin. God made one of you, just one. You were planned for and have things to teach every single person you meet. You may not know exactly what that is now, but your angel is watching over you and will explain it all later. You don’t have to believe that of course, but it’s a lot more fun than thinking otherwise.
This is not an complete list of my crushers, if you’d like to learn more, let me know or if you have some that you would like a fun inner vision for, I am happy to oblige! And as always, please comment, like & share because you are my inspiration!
